Thursday, February 22, 2007
Something I wrote a few months ago I felt a need to post
Hey Everybody,
I wanted to send you all an email and share something with you from my heart. Two years ago or so something absolutely life changing happened to me. My spiritual life was stagnant and quite frankly my personal life was boring. I was so sick of waking up everyday going to work, getting off at 3:30, fiddling around on the computer, watching the new TV shows I liked, going to bed, and waking up the next morning doing it all over again. Don't get me wrong, I was and still am very blessed but there was something in my spirit that was unsettled. After months and even years of feeling that way, I finally began to question why I was feeling that way. What is going on with me? How can I be truly happy again? There has got to be more to life than this!!! I can remember morning after morning driving to work in the dark and feeling so disappointed and defeated that the night before, just as I always did, I watched TV, played on the computer, and had my usual bottle of wine to numb the monotony. I felt so ashamed of what my life had become, living in pure selfishness, that I went for soooooo long without even praying because I felt that my prayers were so stinkin' lowly that they weren't even worthy for God to hear. As you all know, once you feel like you've hit rock bottom, as we all have, there is no way to go but up. God allows us to hit rock bottom because He knows that at that point if we ever wanna stand back up and keep going, we will have to call upon His name to help us. I reached that point one day and began to cry out to God, wondering how my life had gotten to this point. I felt like it had absolutely no purpose whatsoever. I asked God to show me my calling in this life and give me something to do for Him. Morning after morning on the way to work I would pray that prayer and finally began to think that He wasn't listening. I reached that "rock bottom" feeling again that I was so sure I was out of. I remembered a very important person in my life had fasted about a MAJOR life changing issue just a year or so previous to that time. I recalled how things had turned out after their fast and the wise words they had given to me regarding the subject of fasting. I finally decided I was gonna fast. I mean, at that point, I had nothing to lose. I was already at the bottom or so I felt.
When I think of fasting, food is the first thing that comes to my mind. I began to pray about what I was going to fast and food just didn't really fit me or my situation. Sure I like to eat and that would be a big sacrifice but shutting off the "background noise" and spending quiet times in prayer and reading would truly be the best route, so I began that fast on the following Monday. I went into the fast, never having fasted before mind you, not knowing what to expect. How long should I fast? Hmmm… I thought I would just start off on a Monday and stop when I felt I had received the answer I was looking for. Waiting for God to move, isn't that a test on our patience? I came home each evening and sat down on my couch and began to pray and read the Bible and another book I felt led to read. Fast forward to the following Friday and I went to my bed and was lying on my back praying and began to cry out to God the same prayer I had started with many months before, "God!!! Please show me my calling-Tell me what I'm supposed to do!!" Then, in this overwhelming feeling like I'd never felt before, I heard the word SERVE in my spirit. "SERVE SERVE SERVE" God said. WOW-what a feeling that was. At that moment I felt a release from the fast and knew I had received the answer I was looking for. The next morning felt like an entirely different lifetime. I felt like a changed person. I began to seek out ways I could serve people in every situation. The more I dug in and tried to serve others and in turn serve God, the more hungry He made me to serve. He truly gave me a burning passion in my heart to minister to other people and SERVE them in any possible way they might need.
Please don't get me wrong, I don't say all of this as a "look at me-I have a calling and I've discovered the tip of that calling". I say it because fasting made me discover this calling and purpose in life I was so desperately looking for. It made me remove the worldly things that kept me from hearing God's voice and showed God how desperately serious I was about making this change in my life.
How do you know when to pray and fast and when to just pray? That is not a question that someone else can always answer for you. But here is a principle: In God's word we always find fasting connected with a very troubled spirit or a very anxious heart before the Lord. So a reason for fasting is not something you choose on the spur of the moment. Rather the reason is a consuming one. In a sense, it's not something you choose, so much as something that chooses you, because it's that important. Right now, I have an anxious and troubled spirit regarding the community of Frisco and our church. Alter Church is called of God as a multi-cultural, community-focused church with a heart for winning souls for the Kingdom. We need to fast for communities in the Frisco area and for Alter Church. I can tell you from experience, God WILL move, and that's a promise, if we will turn off all the background noise, listen for His voice, and show him how serious we are about serving the community and in turn building Alter Church to what God called it here to be.
God said in Jeremiah 29: 13,14 "When you seek me with all your heart, I will be found by you." If we are willing to set aside the legitimate appetites of the body to concentrate on the work of praying, we are demonstrating that we mean business and that we are seeking God's Hand to move in our lives, the community, and Alter Church. Stand with us church, pray about fasting and do so if you feel God leads you to, and lets watch God blow this thing wide open!
Love you guys and gals,
Justin 469-236-0116
justinhankins@grandecom.net
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment